The Bad C Word
March 31, 2011
My mama's been avoiding putting up this page for quite some time, even though I told her it's OK. I've been having some discomfort in my right leg. Fortunately, the people at daycare noticed it and mentioned it to my papa. In a serendipitous serious of events, I went for an X-ray of my leg. This was a moment a that changed my life. You see, I have bone cancer in my right femur (just above my knee). This type of bone cancer in dogs is not a great thing, I've learned, because it makes everyone gasp when we tell them and then they get watery eyes and look at me with those sad eyes, so that it's hard for me to smile. I worry if they will be OK, and I really just want everyone to be happy.
My mama's been avoiding putting up this page for quite some time, even though I told her it's OK. I've been having some discomfort in my right leg. Fortunately, the people at daycare noticed it and mentioned it to my papa. In a serendipitous serious of events, I went for an X-ray of my leg. This was a moment a that changed my life. You see, I have bone cancer in my right femur (just above my knee). This type of bone cancer in dogs is not a great thing, I've learned, because it makes everyone gasp when we tell them and then they get watery eyes and look at me with those sad eyes, so that it's hard for me to smile. I worry if they will be OK, and I really just want everyone to be happy.
April 4, 2011
A Week of Fun
Ever since I've found out about the bone cancer, I've been getting lots of walks to the beach and people are coming to see me more. This, of course, makes me happy, but I know that something is wrong, because I'm just that kinda dog. I can sense how people feel. Here I am on my favorite beach at sunset. I'm contemplating life and, somewhere deep inside, I know that my life is going to change here shortly. But for now, it's been a long and fun day. I think I haven't been home at all today, just sitting at the beach with my papa. I dragged him all the way to Granville Island and demanded that he get me one of those twisty bones, which I devoured. I think I could have dragged him anywhere and he would have bought me anything that day. I could tell. He was supposed to go on a cruise but has decided to spend 2 weeks of daddy daughter days with me! 2 Weeks! This is me having loads of fun this week!
(hmmm mama doesn't quite know how to turn this video right side up, so you might as well stretch out your neck while you're at it. Don't forget to stretch the other side too)
April 5, 2011
My Mama's Poem to Me
I decided to post this poem written by my mama. I think it makes her feel better to write and anyway, she made many promises in the poem, which I intend to hold her to! So now it's published and everyone knows what she promised me! (especially the cooking part)
My Promise to Lola
If you promise not to leave, I promise I'll be forever by your side.
We'll take more walks to the beach and contemplate life as the waves crash on the rocks
I'll throw your favourite red ball and you can chase it over and over again, to your heart's content.
You'll have one less leg but all the more of my love.
If you promise not to leave, I promise to be better.
I'll think of things more simply like you do
And be more happy in the moment.
Like you are, whether it's chasing a ball, going for a stroll, or smiling at every passerby, hoping for a gentle pat on the head.
If you promise not to leave, I'll be the person you think I am
When you first see me and wag your tail and smile widely, like only you can.
I'll hug you like it's been a lifetime since I last saw you
I'll even learn to cook for you.
If you promise not to leave, I'll forever cherish all the memories of you
Your first birthday "party" when, after a bath, you put your blond nose in a planter full of wet dirt
And smiled, thinking you were so clever.
And when you chased a poor old man's walker, because there were two tennis balls attached.
And when you let me do whatever to you, like put a wig or pancakes on your head for photo ops!
If you promise not to leave, I'll walk by your side
For as long as you like
Wherever you like
I'll sing to you, I'll skip, I'll let you bite my heels
Just promise not to leave.
We'll take more walks to the beach and contemplate life as the waves crash on the rocks
I'll throw your favourite red ball and you can chase it over and over again, to your heart's content.
You'll have one less leg but all the more of my love.
If you promise not to leave, I promise to be better.
I'll think of things more simply like you do
And be more happy in the moment.
Like you are, whether it's chasing a ball, going for a stroll, or smiling at every passerby, hoping for a gentle pat on the head.
If you promise not to leave, I'll be the person you think I am
When you first see me and wag your tail and smile widely, like only you can.
I'll hug you like it's been a lifetime since I last saw you
I'll even learn to cook for you.
If you promise not to leave, I'll forever cherish all the memories of you
Your first birthday "party" when, after a bath, you put your blond nose in a planter full of wet dirt
And smiled, thinking you were so clever.
And when you chased a poor old man's walker, because there were two tennis balls attached.
And when you let me do whatever to you, like put a wig or pancakes on your head for photo ops!
If you promise not to leave, I'll walk by your side
For as long as you like
Wherever you like
I'll sing to you, I'll skip, I'll let you bite my heels
Just promise not to leave.
April 6, 2011
Four Minus One is Three
After a long day at play, I slept so well. Here is a picture my papa took of me while I was sleeping soundly. Here I am, all curled up, dreaming of running through a field of yellow flowers chasing butterflies.
Here I am with all 4 paws.
Today I went in for surgery to remove the cancer. No one told me that I would be losing a leg with the cancer, but after today, I will only have 3 lovely blond doodle legs.
Here I am with all 4 paws.
Today I went in for surgery to remove the cancer. No one told me that I would be losing a leg with the cancer, but after today, I will only have 3 lovely blond doodle legs.
April 12, 2011
Please Look at Me the Same
You are the world to me. In your eyes, I see a reflection of me, so please don't look at me differently. All I know is that I woke up and I felt dopey (more dopey than usual).
And I only had 3 legs.
My life has changed, but the pain is gone. And what I truly want (other than to not have cancer and to be with you forever) is for you to look at me the same. Because remember I can see me in your eyes. So please see me as you did before, as a happy, dopey, goofy, loving, friendly doodle. I am still me. My goal is still the same, to make you happy .. and to chase red Kong balls. So if you are happy, then when I look in your eyes, I will see a happy smiling doodle.
April 16, 2011
Recuperating and Acceptance
It's taking me a while to get used to this. It feels weird to walk, I'm not really sure what happened. I know my leg doesn't hurt anymore, but I'm so very tired. I also got back from chemotherapy April 15 and I think they put some sleepy juice in be... because I'm so sleepy. It worries my mama and papa and everyone else, but I just need some time to recuperate.. and to get used to the new me. Remember I lost a leg and had toxins injected into me! I was listening to this song today and it reminded me of my parents:
I need to know that you will always be
The same old someone that I knew,
What will it take till you believe in me,
The way that I believe in you?
Just believe in me. I'll get through this tiredness. Remember I always believe in you, no matter what. Just give me some time to recuperate!
Today, we all went to the park by the beach where no doggies are, but I had my mama, papa and uncle Brady all to myself. I even got to eat a hot dog when they were eating theirs! Then we just lay on a blanket and sniffed the ocean air. It was a good day to contemplate life and the concept of acceptance.
This is a picture of me chomping away at my hot dog... and me playing with uncle Brady the day after chemo.
I need to know that you will always be
The same old someone that I knew,
What will it take till you believe in me,
The way that I believe in you?
Just believe in me. I'll get through this tiredness. Remember I always believe in you, no matter what. Just give me some time to recuperate!
Today, we all went to the park by the beach where no doggies are, but I had my mama, papa and uncle Brady all to myself. I even got to eat a hot dog when they were eating theirs! Then we just lay on a blanket and sniffed the ocean air. It was a good day to contemplate life and the concept of acceptance.
This is a picture of me chomping away at my hot dog... and me playing with uncle Brady the day after chemo.
May 2, 2011
Take Time to Smell the Flowers
I'm doing pretty well now. Today I'm playing in mama's garden and taking time to smell all her pretty flowers that are just now coming up. She's got some pretty special things and she gets pretty excited to look at them and see their progress and then she screeches in excitement when something new has come up! I guess I can understand. I feel the same way about my red Kong ball. The lesson today is to take time to smell the flowers (actually I'm eating some of mama's grasses here but don't tell, and anyway, vegetables are healthy). Life can be short so let's spend it smiling and happy and appreciate all the little things in life.. like eating mama's flowers.. hee hee
Below you'll see some pictures of me happy as usual and playing with my sister Penelope. She's sorta hyper, but I guess I was like that at her age. I'm still bigger though and I can steal the ball from her and take her spot in bed.. and on the outside couch.. That girl can wait for a hour for someone to throw the ball. She's sillly... she gets so excited she shakes, shivers and her teeth chatter. I'm gonna have to have a talk with her and teach her how to take some time to smell (aka eat) flowers too. We doos.. we're pretty ball obsessed.
Below you'll see some pictures of me happy as usual and playing with my sister Penelope. She's sorta hyper, but I guess I was like that at her age. I'm still bigger though and I can steal the ball from her and take her spot in bed.. and on the outside couch.. That girl can wait for a hour for someone to throw the ball. She's sillly... she gets so excited she shakes, shivers and her teeth chatter. I'm gonna have to have a talk with her and teach her how to take some time to smell (aka eat) flowers too. We doos.. we're pretty ball obsessed.
May 4, 2011
Training Mama and Penelope
I have taught my sister, Penelope, how to be a bad 2 year old (see Lesson #3 in 'Growing Up'). Though I'm gonna have to work on her a bit, because her chocolately nose was not nearly as dirty as my blond one.
I've also been enjoying mama's home cooking. Don't tell but it's actually pretty good! See, you need to know that mama got 49% in cooking and sewing in school - yep 49%! So to learn how to make my "cancer starving diet", mama had to actually google (hey, that sorta sounds like doodle) 'how to boil an egg'. She really didn't know! But now I get homemade veggie, egg, and chicken Doo Stoos! mmm delicious!
I've also been enjoying mama's home cooking. Don't tell but it's actually pretty good! See, you need to know that mama got 49% in cooking and sewing in school - yep 49%! So to learn how to make my "cancer starving diet", mama had to actually google (hey, that sorta sounds like doodle) 'how to boil an egg'. She really didn't know! But now I get homemade veggie, egg, and chicken Doo Stoos! mmm delicious!
This is my pot of goodness!
This is what my mama cooks for herself, 'cause she doesn't know how to cook. Anyway don't feel bad, because I offered to share mine. I'd even get her a red "human" bowl like my "dog" one above!
chomp chomp chomp.
May 8, 2011
If You Want me to Laugh, Do a Few Cartwheels, Please
I know you see only 3 blond doodley legs here, but don't worry -- I'm back! I've been recuperating, playing in my gramma and grampa's yard, chasing my sister Penelope, chasing sticks, eating my doo stoo, getting new treats -- like a new yellow ball that is just as great as my red Kong ball! It's been a month since I lost my leg -- I've had my one month ampu-versary and I'm doing great!
Though I'll tell you a secret -- if I'm particularly lazy or not smiling as much, an easy way to make me smile is to do a few cartwheels. Cartwheels make me laugh.
Here I am happy as can be, running to chase my stick, playing in the backyard with Molly and my sister Penelope. I laughed when mama put on a Canucks shirt on Penelope.. now Penelope knows how I felt when mama put pancakes and wigs on my head! hee hahaaaa
(Oh yeah it's time to stretch you neck again. Mama doesn't know how to turn videos ... so again stretch both sides of you neck please).
Though I'll tell you a secret -- if I'm particularly lazy or not smiling as much, an easy way to make me smile is to do a few cartwheels. Cartwheels make me laugh.
Here I am happy as can be, running to chase my stick, playing in the backyard with Molly and my sister Penelope. I laughed when mama put on a Canucks shirt on Penelope.. now Penelope knows how I felt when mama put pancakes and wigs on my head! hee hahaaaa
(Oh yeah it's time to stretch you neck again. Mama doesn't know how to turn videos ... so again stretch both sides of you neck please).
May 20, 2011
BEEEEACH Day!
Today was the first really hot day of the year, and so it was designated as my first BEACH day! I haven't gone to the beach to swim since... before my surgery! So here's me smiling happily during the car ride in anticipation of the beach!
Mama went to the dog store and got all kinds of goodies for us. Squeaky toys (Grampa loves it when I spend the day squeaking them; it's our favourite "grampa-grand daughter activity), chuck it balls that whistle and squish in our mouths, and omega 3 salmon treats! Here I am waiting not-so-patiently to go to the beach!
We did have to bring my spaz of a sister, Penelope, along too. Here we are waiting to be let out so we can tear down the beach towards the ocean! Let us OUT, let us OUT!
I can RUN!
Everyone is surprised at how fast I've recuperated. Let me first say that I've been known to be a bit of a lazy doo. I love to sleep in and saunter along with my papa on walks and just make sure I smile at every one. But this was the first beach day in a LONG time and I can RUN!
I can SWIM!
Ok so spazzy sister, Penelope, can definitely run faster than I can. But I am the master swimmer! I don't mean to make fun (giggle giggle), but Penelope is the funniest, silliest swimmer. Think of the song and dance .... "Y M C A" and that's Penelope. We couldn't stop laughing at her! She swims with her legs sticking straight up in the air out of the water! There were several times we were all going to strip down to swim to rescue her! So yeah, she can outrun me, but oh can I swim! Even with just 3 fuzzy doo legs!
I'm ready for our TRIATHALON!
We're quite the team! I'm pretty sure that we can do our own triathalon, between Penelope (the spaz runner), me (the best swimmer), and uncle Brady (he can bike, as I just can't bike with one back doo leg). And what will mama do? Mama can stretch us out yogi like after! And take pictures, because you know Asians and their cameras...
People on the beach kept asking mama how I could do so well following an amputation. Mama's quite proud of me because she always told me that when you set your mind to something, go for it. We are the only ones that hold ourselves back. So if you have a dream or a goal, my advice is to go for it! You just might surprise yourself!
People on the beach kept asking mama how I could do so well following an amputation. Mama's quite proud of me because she always told me that when you set your mind to something, go for it. We are the only ones that hold ourselves back. So if you have a dream or a goal, my advice is to go for it! You just might surprise yourself!
After a Day at the Beach
Of course, after a day at the beach, we have to have baths and then we recuperate while mama cooks us more fresh doo stoo. Then tomorrow's a big day! Tomorrow we are having a Canucks hockey watching party. We're all gonna dress up in Canucks gear for that! Go Canucks GO!
Go CANUCKS Go!
August 8, 2011
Summer Time!
Dont' worry, I'm FINE!
It's mama you have to worry about. The woman never stops working. And you know what THAT means. That means she's not devoting her time to writing our story together with me! Or maybe she was depressed that the Canucks lost the Stanley Cup. I dunno... Anyway, summer has been fun. It was a late summer that started out in Tofino, a lovely trip away where papa rented a little hut on the beach where we could play and play!
It's mama you have to worry about. The woman never stops working. And you know what THAT means. That means she's not devoting her time to writing our story together with me! Or maybe she was depressed that the Canucks lost the Stanley Cup. I dunno... Anyway, summer has been fun. It was a late summer that started out in Tofino, a lovely trip away where papa rented a little hut on the beach where we could play and play!
Tofino Fun!
Mama packed us lots of toys and balls to play with on the beach!
Here we are after sunset on the beach! That's me and Penelope doo.
This is me and Pork Chop on our road trip to Tofino. We rode in the back of Papa's car.
Anyway, here's a bit of what else I've been up to....
I have a SMALL bum!
When I look in the mirror, I see a small doo. I can hear sometimes people whispering in their funny human talk that I have a big bum. Those humans, they don't realize that dogs have great hearing! Anyway, I don't think my bum is big at all...Here's why:
I can fit in Molly's bed. And Molly is a small dog. A terror... oopps hee hee I mean Terrior of some sorts. So I have a small bum if I can fit in her bed!
I have a small bum so I can sit in gramma's garden. Gramma loooves her garden. She tends to it every day and knows all the names of the plants. Like the real scientific names. Sometimes she says thing like "Mamoosalum phyllus baboosalum". Anyway, she's a plant expert! And because I have a small bum, I can sit in the plants to cool off. Those mamoosalums are very comfortable, you know.
Nope, not flattened at all.
Nope, not flattened at all.
Most of my evenings are spent with papa at the park. He sits there and plays this silly sheep game that uncle Brady introduced him to while I sit and smell the flowers. Occasionally if papa is lucky, I'll pose for a picture but jeez humans... live in the moment instead of trying to capture everything in a photo!
Save the sheep, papa!
I'm All Smiles!
I really like summer. Summer means lots of walks and happy mamas and papas. It means sitting in the shade in the park or in mama's or gramma's garden. It means going to the beach and meeting dog friends. In general, summer makes me happy. Here are some pictures of me in Happy Summer Days!
Doodle Smiles...
I have a theory. During one of my afternoon meditations I came up with it. Penelope doo doesn't like her teeth! She always smiles with her mouth closed. Uncle Brady has figured it out too!
Penelope's Smile.
Uncle Brady's Imitation
My laugh.
Uncle Brady's Imitation
This is my imitation of Penelope
And Penelope's Imitation of me!
(She didn't quite get it, did she?)
(Oh well, maybe uncle Brady can make her new teeth!)
(Oh well, maybe uncle Brady can make her new teeth!)
August 10, 2011
They Say It's Bad News
They say it's bad news. But I suppose it's all a matter of opinion. As far as I know, today when I went to the vet for my cancer poison juice, they decided not to give it to me! To me, that's GREAT because I can't say it's my favourite thing to do - to be dropped off and left there for a day with strangers and other sick doggies.
But my mama did not look well when she came to pick me up. They took her into a room to talk to her privately and show her some pictures of my lungs. "Cotton balls", they said. Tear inducing cotton balls. I guess I don't like cotton balls, 'cause people use those to clean my stinky ears. But mama's really didn't like this news. There are metastases to my lungs, little cotton balls, not big, but they are there, none the less. Which means all that poison juice is not working. So now, I will be going on another type of chemotherapy, given in the form of a pill. I don't have to go into the vet anymore for this treatment. My papa is so sad too, but he's made me and mama a promise, here's what he said:
"I am just happy she is alive and I still have time to be with her. I will wait until she is gone to be upset, I promise."
See I don't know what cancer is. I don't know that I'm ill. In fact, I feel fine as you can see in my pictures above. I feel fine. And I'm happiest when people are smiling back at me, remember?
August 13, 2011
Princess Lola
I am now called Princess Lola. I know it's because of the cotton balls in my lungs, but I guess every girl deserves to be a princess! I get to walk wherever I like. You see, I can be quite stubborn. If I want to walk someone and my walker doesn't want to, I'll just put my head down just so and they can't pull me the other way. People just give up and let me have my way. So, the other day, I walked all the way to Granville Island, or should I say I dragged my papa all the way there, 'cause that's where the juicy dog bones are! Except, I haven't figured out how to tell the time yet and when I got there, I waited and waited...
Papa took me to Capers instead and got me some steak. I like steak. Mama and gramma and uncle Brady are now going to make me beef steak doo stoos. I'm really looking forward to those.
August 14, 2011
4 Legs and 2 Wings Again
Please click HERE.